208 replies to this topic

[Calvary]

Sounds shitty. I'm sure none of it is down to 'negative charisma', you seem fine to me, and I'm sure many others here. Might I make the suggestion that hanging around comic book shops to make friends with similar tastes isn't always the best solution? That sounds sarcastic but it isn't meant to be. Sometimes you'll find plenty of people with mutual interests in places you don't expect them. The best thing to do--in my most esteemed of opinions--is to just engage people as you would, and as you get to know them, bring up things you enjoy. You may find a lot of people are closet nerds. I mean hell, when I was younger and obsessed with Warhammer, I didn't realise my two besties were into it as well for years. It was only a passing comment that led us to realise we shared a passion for the same thing.

[Photography Raptor]

Man I hate that one person ruins it for the rest of us.

Come February mandatory hearing protection, no food or soda outside the break room. No taking breaks at your work station, and tons of other fun stuff being updated in the old handbook. I got a feeling music will eventually be gone too.

Dude was caught with a foot long above his work station. He would feed leather and take a nibble. Like seriously? I have my snacks but I don't bust out a bag of chips are chow down while working getting shit on the product. Fuck.

I guess in my current position this doesn't affect me as I work next to the break area and can literally go any time. I just hate that mode of thinking.

[Mister Sympa]

I fucking hate that. One asshole, and suddenly all the fun is sucked out of a perfectly fine situation.

[m1splacedSan1ty]

Honestly not having nice things in the beginning is the best. 

[Affray]

My dad is the best ever but he doesn't talk or really do anything. I lost my mom a couple years back and she was the glue that kept our family together. My sister is ten years older than me and was extremely disappointed when I didn't outgrow my nerdyness. Psychology major that tries to analyze everything but never did anything with it. She has to be what society thinks she should be and I just do what makes me happy. Brother in law is a complete asshole. He is an atypical Texan and is always right. Thinks he's god's gift to the world and tried to leave my sister. Sister forgave him and nobody talks about it. Also thinks I'm a disappointment.

My husband is just as nerdy as me but, like my dad, doesn't talk much. Also he's faster and mostly better than me at everything. I can only lose (get destroyed) so much before its just not fun. He plays likes he's in a tournament all the time. He has his own friends and stuff to do without me. Which leaves me with nobody as I have no friends. I haven't found a game store, that's a reasonable distance, where everybody doesn't treat me like I'm not nerdy enough. Everybody I do enjoy talking to prefers my husband. I have some anxiety and awkwardness. I hate small talk and am straightforward. I have been thinking about playing a skype DND game.

People have always just not liked me for some reason. Negative charisma I suppose. My last "friend" just used me as a designated driver and wingman. She blamed me for hanging out with my (then bf) husband while she met some random guy on the internet. Who apparently tried to rape her. I am so far off from girly its not funny. 

And my husbands family just talks to us during holidays that we can give their kids stuff. I can't have kids so we've pretty much dropped off their radar. 

I don't even need somebody to physically be there @.@ like even an internet penpal would work. I usually find dudes and then they find out I'm married and bail.

A lot of what you said here sounds pretty close to the way my wife is.

She used to think it was her fault that people stopped hanging out with her after a while and constantly tried to figure out what she could do to change herself in to someone that people preferred. Which is a bad idea overall. Be who you are going to be and the people the like it will eventually find you. Book stores are awesome for finding friends. I've made friends in Chapters by loitering around the sci-fi/fantasy/horror looking at stuff and when I see someone checking out a book I've read I let them know how it was and try to guide them to some excellent choices. The odd person will have their brain line up and they will realise that I am in to the same shit as them and boom, new friend. Even if they are just a once in a while "Hey how's it going?" kind of friend, those make the day nice sometimes.

 

Your husband also sounds pretty close to how me and my wife were a while back.

I have to win games, I have to. The reason that I play any kind of game is to win that game and I couldn't get my head around any other reason to play something if it wasn't to be the best at it. My wife sometimes wants to play cards or a board game just for the sake of doing something with me, and I come screaming in like an eagle on speed with victory on the brain. She used to get super upset because she just doesn't understand why I HAD to play to win and couldn't just enjoy our time together. I couldn't get my head around why someone would play a game and not have victory over me be their goal, but some people are literally just in it for a good time. So I toned down my blood lust for victory and started playing with her just to play. Honestly, it kid of sucks. But if it makes her happy I can destroy everyone else I play games with extra hard. People also prefer my company over hers simply because I am a presence and she tends not to be. I can't help but be dynamic and out there chatting it up at parties, it's just who I am. She hated it because when I start talking she fades in to the background because she feels stupid/awkward/forgettable. So when we do social things I have to keep a pocket of my brain aware that she is standing there feeling vulnerable and awkward, because I used to get so caught up in other conversations that she was kind of left on her own standing there. Now I try to pull her in whenever I can so she can get some social action without having to force herself in.

 

That ended up being a bit long, but I do have a point.

Your family stuff is shitty in it's own rights, but you can't always have an effect on that.

Sometimes you just have to let them spin their wheels and move on with your own shit.

 

Your husband on the other hand is someone who you should be able to talk to about what he does to make you feel bad/unappreciated/unnoticed.

I speak from experience when I say that sometimes we just have zero idea that we are raining on your parade with our lust for victory or social prowess.

If and when you talk to him about it he is probably going to be pissed, I definitely was when my wife brought up some stuff like this.

The anger/frustration will mostly be from not understanding, or wishing you would just get your shit together and get with the program without being babied. (My reaction when my wife let me know I overshadow her every time at social events). We smarten up sooner or later though, you just have to give us some time to sort out what's important. I love being in a group of people and have them all smiling because of what I'm talking about, but I like it when my wife is happier more and I bet your husband is the same.

 

 

Man I hate that one person ruins it for the rest of us.

Come February mandatory hearing protection, no food or soda outside the break room. No taking breaks at your work station, and tons of other fun stuff being updated in the old handbook. I got a feeling music will eventually be gone too.

Dude was caught with a foot long above his work station. He would feed leather and take a nibble. Like seriously? I have my snacks but I don't bust out a bag of chips are chow down while working getting shit on the product. Fuck.

I guess in my current position this doesn't affect me as I work next to the break area and can literally go any time. I just hate that mode of thinking.

At my previous job they cracked down on people eating while working, which was fucked because it's a truck flooring factory that puts out a product so shitty they had to create a new classification for it because it was so far below the lowest grading. I was almost written up for having a Werther's in my mouth after the crack down and my manager almost got a verbal lashing that would have cost me my job. It was all because a few guys would walk around with full bags of chips and cans of pop on the floor and mow away. Zero tolerance policies are fucking stupid. Because some fat, diabetic walking heart attack can't control himself and act like an adult I can't have a fucking butterscotch candy INSIDE MY MOUTH while I slug away making the company tens of thousands of dollars? That is how you get a manager with a broken nose or a union push. Sometimes (most) bureaucracy makes me stupid angry crazy and I want to burn down a flooring factory, which the place nearly does on it's own anyway.

[Mister Sympa]

>I was almost written up for having a Werther's in my mouth

 

Um, holy fuck.

[Affray]

>I was almost written up for having a Werther's in my mouth

 

Um, holy fuck.

Yeah man.

It's called Rockland Flooring and it's an American company, I worked at the only Canadian factory.

Just a greasy, unsafe place to work that is run by morons and criminals.

[Elfie]

>I was almost written up for having a Werther's in my mouth
 
Um, holy fuck.

I have werthers in my mouth right now

[SpleenBeGone]

I need to buy some Werther's, I haven't had one in forever. 

[Elfie]

Sooo good!

[Affray]

I need to buy some Werther's, I haven't had one in forever. 

Dude.

You are in for some serious revelation in the near future.

I hadn't had any Werther's for a good handful of years then last winter I got a bag to eat at work.

They were my favourite as a kid and it turns out they have some pretty impressive staying power.

[idk]

To be fair I think that reasonably describes most workplaces,we seem to have an awful lot of lazy/shitty people in our country despite the "Canadians are all nice people" meme. Worthers seem to have some sort of staying power, they're doing something right.

[Elfie]

Canadians are lazy, wow it's crazy to hear negative things about other countries people for a change hahaha

[Affray]

Canadians are lazy, wow it's crazy to hear negative things about other countries people for a change hahaha

I have met some horrible, evil people who unfortunately share my nationality.

We decent Canadians just try our best to offset their stupid horseshit as best we can.

It must be working since as a country we are renown world wide for being polite and decent people.

[Elfie]

I'm nice and polite, maybe I should move to Canada

[Calvary]

Nationality is irrelevant, you're gonna get shitty people wherever you go. You don't cross an arbitrary line in the dirt and suddenly everyone's nice.

 

Can you tell I'm in the xmas spirit?

[Elfie]

It's ok Gol! Merry holidays never the less. You need hugs! Group hug!!!

[Photography Raptor]

In preparation for a little one we started (on Christmas) cleaning out the house. We officially have stopped using our garage for her car and turned it into storage.

 

Stage 1 is making space. It went smoothly, got my second TV stand, second couch, lots of stuff moved out there.

 

Stage 2 is cleaning out the bedroom and office closets to make room for her. Even though we're getting her a nice dresser we should have room for toys to keep in house. Disaster struck --

 

Bedroom closet has a huge mold infestation in one corner. Coming from under the house. A dozen of her shoes, purses, hats, you name it are moldy. Three 13 gallon bags of her stuff getting thrown out. So yeah, I get to deal with that. Or I should say the landlord does. An inconvenience nonetheless. I can take bleach water and kill the surface mold, but there needs to be new trim, carpet and drywall put in.

 

Stage 3 is simple. Just rearranging our current furniture and moving my desk to the living room and glider cage to the bedroom.

 

Stage 4 is finding a bigger house, which will wait until spring/summer. Fuck moving in winter.

 

All in all, she can live without 10, 000 pairs of shoes. Just thankful her favorite things were not affected. Like her renaissance garbs.

 

I'm not too thrilled about my gaming throne being in the living room but I'll deal.

[Elfie]

Good luck with the little old and the mold

[Mister Sympa]

Oh, christ, ew. Good luck!