Bestmand902

...Oh fuck did I really just type that?

I....Really wasn't thinking when I typed that. Sorry. I was just really tired and wasn't thinking about what I was saying and I might have been exaggerating. It was 1:00 in the morning and I really should've gone to bed because I have a tendancy to say really stupid things when I'm tired, like it feels like I have a looser grasp on what I can and can't say. And that's something I felt I could say. And looking at it now, it feels like  a right overdramatic thing to say. Lemme try and reword it:

The things going on around the things going on in the world have upset me and I feel strongly about it, but I don't feel like I can do much about it, and the future scares me because I don't know how good the future is going to be and my mind keeps exaggerating it into a dystopia, when we don't know the future yet.

Certainly. But is a simple joke really something that deserves all of that? 

Oh. I don't know, maybe joking about a situation where trans people have been killed, and on top of that, there are laws in 49 states where the murderer is let off the hook (Look it up, it's called Trans Panic), is...I dunno, a really F**kin' bad idea?

Google Maps lets you play Pac-Man on any street

Okay, I just want to say I'm sorry about the stuff I said with the "Neckbearded dortio-munching asshole" thing. I was not thinking when I typed that and I was just really, really angry about people who didn't understand that A creator saying that they wanted the change isn't censorship and my mind just dashed to every sterotype I could think of. I love doritos, I'm not so big on mountain dew, and I have a tendency to stay away from stuff like Reddit and 4chan (I don't know if they're in the same caliber or not, but I hear reddit is a bit better) because of the infamy. That was all on me and my lack of forethought. My intention was not to offend or hurt anyone.

Hey, I know what it's like to lose a family member. I just want you to know that I'm here for you. 

What is this fun you speak of?

That's because in PA people don't kn how to spell Bahahaha I'm just kidding

All's well. XD

Awesome is always spelled K.E.L.L.Y

Over in PA we spell it K.A.L.E.B

It really sucks when the loud, pushy (and wrong) minority really ruin something. It's why I shy away from labeling myself as a feminist. Not all Christians are as bad as this guy. I've met way more awesome, kind, and open Christians than I've met bad ones. Anyone who tries to push their beliefs and values on someone else, whether it's faith or political or whatever, they're friggin' assholes.

It does, doesn't it? And I agree with the 'anyone who tries to push their beliefs on someone is an asshole thing'. But there are good and nice people in every walk of life just as there are assholes. 

Pennsylvania. I just like throwing around 'Y'all' and 'yo' because I just think they're funny.

And yeah, I had a lot of soda and boredom when I made this. I may continue if I have more soda XD.

and I'm a guy, just FYI XD

What have I done

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GREG: The Story Of Greg part 2: The Gregoning Part 1

67 YEARS IN THE FUTURE...

Greg was reading a book. It wasn't really a book because the pages were made out of plastic cups and the words were made of the severed-yet-still alive screaming heads of those who defied the empire of the Waffle People, but still it was reading. Just then his door was broken down with the force of a thousand small children punching the ancient titans of greek mythology in the crotch. Such brave warriors

"Yooooo Greg we know you've been hiding gravy and chicken in here and that's against the law and shit so we're hear to arrest you" A waffle-person dressed as a policeman said carrying a large stick with a badger tied to the end of it in one hand

"Fuck you waffle person" Greg said going back to his book. The Waffle-person raised the badger stick above his head and struck Greg in the toenail which somehow caused Greg to faint because Toenail damage is very traumatizing yessireebob

When Greg woke up he was in a human-sized Goldfish bowl minus the water. Two Waffle-people approached Greg and they both spoke in unison

"We are the president Waffleguy" They said with much gumption. "We're here to tell you that your sentence is death. Your head shall be cut off to make new words in my latest memoir 'Story of the Waffle President' because we're efficient and want to avoid the environmental damage severed heads cause."

The two teleported away, leaving Greg to contemplate his fate in the goldfish bowl.

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WILL GREG ESCAPE THE WAFFLE PEOPLE?
FIND OUT PROBABLY SOON
SAME GREG TIME
SAME GREG CHANNEL

I wasn't sure where to put this, but I kinda wanted to share this webseries I really like watching with y'all. It's called "Tabletop"
It's pretty much Wil Wheaton and his guest stars playing a bunch of tabletop games. It's honestly really funny to me

Here's the first episode:

Hey guys here's a story I wrote when I had too much sugar.

Enjoy because this doesn't make any godamn sense and is intentionally written poorly

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GREG: THE STORY OF GREG Part 1: Electric Bullshit

"Beep beep it's the morning wake up you fucking bagel" Greg's alarm clock said with the force of 100 screaming pandas. Greg got up from his bed and threw the alarm clock out the window because alarm clocks shouldn't call you a bagel because that's rude yo

"Oh dingle I'm hungry" Greg said, jumping out the window to go get some subs from Sheetz or a bucket of froyo or some shit like that

As he ran down the streets of somewherewhofivesaguckville a bunch of rain came down from the sky

And by rain I mean it was raining semi trucks. You ever been hit by a falling semi? that shit hurts yo

As Greg dodged semis as is tradition of the seventh sunday in the month of iojsdfouaisgfougra, he ran into some guy clothed entirely in red and black and with a goatee

"Yoooooo Jafar" Greg said. Jafar simply did what Jafars do and laughed a british laugh and sang a villain song about how the semis were going to help him take over Agrabah or whatever. Then he got hit by a semi because fuck that noise

Greg continued his jog/sprint for his life to sheetz because he was hungry and scared and wanted to watch Aladdin. He did a backflip into the window of sheetz with the grace of a stick of butter trying to win the olympics in a wheelchair god bless that butter for trying and being my inspiration on how to live my life and what am I even typing some get this Dr Pepper away from me heeeeeeeeeeelp

"Yoooo I want some MTOs Biiiiiiiiiiitch" Greg said as happy as a man with no legs is when he finds his missing legs and marries them both. 

"Hey you got the money" the Rock behind the counter said. How progressive of Sheetz to give rocks equal rights by employing them

Greg realized that he forgot his money at home and said "Sorry homesies, I got no money. I guess this is a stick-up now"

As those words left his mouth life the audience for The Devil Inside left the theater only with less anger, a robot with a boombox landed from the sky and said "Yo I'm securitybotguyman let's have a dance off to see if you can earn those subs". Securitybotguyman did a flip in the air but because he has the finnese of a cream cheese donut, he fell over and blew up. Greg did the infamous "Handicapped Panda" dance which is really just flopping about on the floor and screaming like you're having your limbs cut off and ground up to be made into placebo medicine. He won first place in the dance contest and then he got a sub.

THE END

....OR IS IT BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW IF PEOPLE WANT A SEQUEL

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And there's what happens when you give me access to sugar.