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Fantasy stuff that seems wrong


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#1 Kirihime Natsuno

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Posted 08 January 2013 - 01:47 PM

So I was just thinking about this. But I'm sure there's plenty of examples, of where things in fantasy novels, games, movies etc. just don't seem to fit right. The main one that I can come up with right now, is dwarves. Generally they're depicted as living underground, or in caves and such. They're also usually depicted as wielding axes. Surely hammers or pickaxes would be more appropriate? I don't really think they'd have much use for axes underground o_O

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#2 No-Danico

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Posted 08 January 2013 - 01:55 PM

I’m not sure how functional a pickaxe might be in combat, seems awkward to me. I see nothing wrong with them using axes. Mining underground would build muscles needed to swing heavy stuff around, axes, hammers, even pickaxes.

What I wanna know is where’s the dwarves wielding daggers and scimitars. Like they’re unable to use skillful weapons or something. Racist.

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#3 Kirihime Natsuno

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Posted 08 January 2013 - 01:59 PM

I suppose a pickaxe wouldn't work all that differently to a scythe, really. But I just think it'd fit them better than axes, considering where they live. Y'know, turn their work tools into weapons for easy defending, etc.

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#4 Jaz

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Posted 08 January 2013 - 02:41 PM

I’m not sure how functional a pickaxe might be in combat, seems awkward to me.


But... the pickaxe is +25 AD

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#5 Diabolical_Jazz

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Posted 08 January 2013 - 07:19 PM

By that logic, shouldn't humans use scythes and sickles instead of swords? We're an agricultural culture, after all.

Actually, dagger-wielding dwarves would make a lot of sense. Underground = close quarters. It's difficult to swing an axe in close quarters. Smaller weapons prevail.
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#6 Coconut Man

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Posted 13 January 2013 - 03:25 AM

Clever...I see your point

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#7 Calvary

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Posted 13 January 2013 - 09:03 AM

Aye but every dwarven hold is practically an impenetrable fortress, Moria for instance, had held against invaders for centuries it took an enormous force to eventually kill all the dwarfs.

That in itself didn't work for me. I know that it advances the plot and everything, but it didn't seem right for Moria to fall. It's very hard to wipe out a people who know their surroundings so well. Just look at Vietnam and Afghanistan.

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#8 Kirihime Natsuno

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Posted 13 January 2013 - 09:09 AM

It wasn't just an attack that wiped them out, if I remember correctly. They dug too far and set the Balrog free.

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#9 Calvary

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Posted 13 January 2013 - 09:41 AM

Oh really? I don't remember that in the film so maybe they left it out or I didn't listen good enough.

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#10 SpleenBeGone

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Posted 16 January 2013 - 07:19 AM

It wasn't just an attack that wiped them out, if I remember correctly. They dug too far and set the Balrog free.

This.


Oh really? I don't remember that in the film so maybe they left it out or I didn't listen good enough.

It was said in the movie.
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#11 tlh1123

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Posted 16 January 2013 - 07:52 PM

I always notice that dwarves tend to "dig too deep" or at least thats the tendency I see. Not in any movies or books in particular but everytime I seem to hear a plot a dwarve has always dug to deep.
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#12 No-Danico

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Posted 16 January 2013 - 08:02 PM

When I did too deep I usually hit bedrock. Then I have to use dirt to get back to the surface before sunset.

I wanna see a book where Dwarves live in the sky and dig the clouds. Why do they always have to live in the dirt? It’d be much more comfortable on an airship.

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#13 tlh1123

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Posted 16 January 2013 - 10:56 PM

When I did too deep I usually hit bedrock. Then I have to use dirt to get back to the surface before sunset.


Sounds just a bit vaguely similar to Minecraft ;)

I wanna see a book where Dwarves live in the sky and dig the clouds. Why do they always have to live in the dirt? It’d be much more comfortable on an airship.


I think that would be quite a good concept. Exactly opposite from the traditional "living in a hole for eternity only to mine, mine, mine...". Kind of refreshing to hear a different idea ^_^
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#14 No-Danico

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Posted 16 January 2013 - 11:07 PM

Minecraft? No, it's my normal day. I live in a house made of wool and at night, skeletons riding spiders shoot arrows at me.

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#15 tlh1123

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Posted 17 January 2013 - 07:05 PM

Minecraft? No, it's my normal day. I live in a house made of wool and at night, skeletons riding spiders shoot arrows at me.


Ah, man that sounds tough! How did you manage to survive?? :ph34r:
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#16 Matty_poo

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Posted 18 January 2013 - 11:44 AM

Minecraft? No, it's my normal day. I live in a house made of wool and at night, skeletons riding spiders shoot arrows at me.


but are they giant spiders or man sized spiders...which I guess relative to their size is in fact giant.

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#17 tlh1123

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Posted 18 January 2013 - 09:51 PM

but are they giant spiders or man sized spiders...which I guess relative to their size is in fact giant.


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#18 No-Danico

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Posted 18 January 2013 - 10:06 PM

GA is a seriously brutal land. Why do you think so many people down here own guns?

And no, the spiders are normal sized, the skeletons are as tall as my thumb and completely harmless.

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#19 tlh1123

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Posted 18 January 2013 - 10:28 PM

GA is a seriously brutal land. Why do you think so many people down here own guns?

And no, the spiders are normal sized, the skeletons are as tall as my thumb and completely harmless.


That's the type of fantasy that goes wrong. I was hoping to meet an actual person who lived in Minecraft :(....

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